According to 2009 US Census Bureau information, 43.6 Million Americans now live in poverty. (Census info)
With Americans drowning in consumer debt, saddled by mortgage payments on homes that are no longer worth what they where purchased for, many Americans have one great important question:
How will I afford all of THIS STUFF?
Black Friday is coming, that day America bows at the Alter of its secret god, Money, in order to buy presents to celebrate the Holiday of one of its "legit" gods, Jesus. But, these last few years it seems people's plastic doesn't stretch as far- they're maxed out, behind on payments, and about to get into some serious trouble with creditors.
Its a real heartbreaker. How will we as American parents celebrate the birth of our savior, advocate of modest living, without lavishing our children with an assortment of war toys, dolls to defeat their body images, and other wonderful consumer goods? How will we impart the true values of our society to the next generation, if we cannot show them all this..stuff?
Clearly, something is wrong with the economic system. Americans can't keep piling on debt- its irresponsible, and most importantly, the creditors have a threshold. So how do we fix this? How do we buy the stuff we want and alleviate the debt-related crises that helped to push so many Americans into poverty?
Rather than moralize and point my fingers at the system of consumption, instead of declaring our ways immoral, bankrupt, and irresponsible, I've chosen a simpler, more optimistic approach. A simple reform, that will help all Americans afford that hot toy this year, whatever that toy may be. I've decided that it is not the system of capitalism that needs to be abolished, but the way we exchange for goods. Yes, for my reform, I simply looked to the marketplace for examples. What would work better for everyone than cash and credit? What could we exchange for goods instead? And then it dawned on me:
FIGHT TO THE DEATH.
Its simple, really.
Lets say you're at Target, and you want an Elmo doll, but you can't afford it. Ok, then you can challenge the retailer to a fight to the death. If you win, you get the elmo (and really, anything else in the store you want), if you lose, you die. And maybe the minimum wage worker who defeated you takes what little money you had in your pockets. Now let's say another customer wants the same product you got. Again, another round of bloodsport. Fight to the death. These rounds would carry on like so until there where no new challengers, meanwhile less sought after goods could be purchased the "traditional way" by other consumers. However, these "traditional buyers" would still be privy to a duel challenge.
This system offers some clear benefits. For one, it truly levels the playing field. The rich may be able to afford more high end products, but can they defend them? The working class now has a chance to bring home a mercedes for christmas, provided the dealer isn't a proficient martial artist. Secondarily, it does not create more debt. Even the family of the deceased could challenge the funeral parlor for debt on the funeral costs. Clearly not creating more debt is a great boone of my system. As more people are killed battling for goods and resources, the country's GDP should be positively affected. Since invariably, the poor will have to fight each other more frequently than other groups, this economic plan has the possibility of decreasing the poverty rate in our country by 50% OR MORE! Furthermore, dead consumers drop demand, leading to a decrease in prices and overall production- creating a more ecologically sound, sustainable system than we currently have.
I hope this Christmas, Walmart looks a little more like THIS.
Tuesday, November 23, 2010
Tuesday, November 2, 2010
The Empire Strikes Back...
Remember how your guts just kind of hurt at the end of "Star Wars: The Empire Strikes Back"? If, like me you saw it when you were very young, you were legitimately concerned- the good guys had indeed had it handed to them by the end, and no one really knew what was going to happen next. You were scared. I know I personally re-watched the movie to make sure I didn't miss the good guys winning in the end. The good guys lost.
Maybe its appropriate that I face the results of the 2010 midterm elections with the same sense of trepidation as I did as a child. On the other hand, this isn't a movie. This is important. Financial policy, foreign policy, the civil rights of our LGBT communities- all of these things are now in flux.
Well, great job America. Great Job. You've done this to yourselves. All 44 or so odd percent of you that put forth the effort to vote, educated opinion or otherwise. We have you to thank for Rand Paul- a special brand of right wing simian thug just a touch to the left of Atilla the Hun has been elected to one of the highest offices in the land. Were this clear example of people voting against common reason or self interest an isolated incident, we might just shrug it off- This kind of thing happens.
But, no no no America, we know how much you love retro- Its 1994 again and the Contract on America is Back! Sweeping victories at the national and state levels for the party of business in an anti-business climate; a resounding win for the party of fiscal irresponsibility in an era that demands fiscal prudence; sweeping the warhawks back to power in the midst of two failing, unpopular wars! The paradoxes are numerous.
Yes, America, you did this to yourself. You've gone and caused yet another blog to be written- yet another ranting series of diatribes randomly generated in the cluttered, binary world of the internet.
Tonight, I could go into a rant about this political issue or that. But, what really has me going are all you people out there. You walking sound-bite lemmings, you short sighted fools who know nothing of the inner workings of the political or economic processes of this country, but know what you've heard, and will be damned if a few popular phrases don't just sum up your ability to critically think about the issues.
Yes, Teabaggers, you're part of this, but so are the soccer moms and work-a-day types who don't bother to inform themselves and just parrot the ludicrous bile they hear on TV.
"Well, I'm just sick of all this big government. Someone needs to stop them."
"You can't just be a tax and spend liberal."
"Obamacare is socialist."
Blah, blah, blah. SHUT UP, America.
Sick of Big Government? Move into an Anarchist commune. You'll love their socialist systems of economic reciprocity! Or, barring that, get used to "Big Government"- Its not going away anytime soon, and I think a government is at its "biggest" and most intrusive when its telling people how to live, who to love, or what to smoke. But of course, most of you are fine with the hypocrisy that comes with railing against so-called "big" Government whilst lobbying for it to intrude upon the personal lives of others. Where was you outrage with the Patriot Act in 2001? The Habeas Corpus Act in 06? The illegal Wire taps? Oh, that didn't bother you? Then SHUT UP, America.
Can't be a tax and spend Liberal? First, I'd argue that its much more reckless to be a No Tax All Spend Conservative, especially when you're spending at least 800 BILLION and counting on a strategic quagmire called the war in Iraq. Furthermore, if you had even a rudimentary understanding of economics, you would understand that the best economic minds in our country were disappointed that the stimulus- which worked- was TOO SMALL! You would be aware of Keynesian economics, you know the economic theories which pulled this country out of the depression and laid the groundwork for our best social safety net- Social Security. I'd like to see any of you old, conservative, fiscally prudent people deny your social security benefits.
Obamacare is socialist, I'll give you that. I mean, seriously, handing private corporations 30+ million new consumers with the caveat that the corporation can't drop them simply because they're sick, yeah I'm pretty sure that's what Marx and Engels were talking about.
America, you are like a drunken fool who can't decide what guy to date so you call them both up to the bar and watch them fight. Despite the wear and tear, the complete lack of faith you've instilled in your electorate, of all things, the Democrats managed to get some decent work done in the last few years. It wasn't perfect, some of it falls far short of what it could have been, but it was progress.
And now, like Lando, you've gone and sold us out again America.
Maybe its appropriate that I face the results of the 2010 midterm elections with the same sense of trepidation as I did as a child. On the other hand, this isn't a movie. This is important. Financial policy, foreign policy, the civil rights of our LGBT communities- all of these things are now in flux.
Well, great job America. Great Job. You've done this to yourselves. All 44 or so odd percent of you that put forth the effort to vote, educated opinion or otherwise. We have you to thank for Rand Paul- a special brand of right wing simian thug just a touch to the left of Atilla the Hun has been elected to one of the highest offices in the land. Were this clear example of people voting against common reason or self interest an isolated incident, we might just shrug it off- This kind of thing happens.
But, no no no America, we know how much you love retro- Its 1994 again and the Contract on America is Back! Sweeping victories at the national and state levels for the party of business in an anti-business climate; a resounding win for the party of fiscal irresponsibility in an era that demands fiscal prudence; sweeping the warhawks back to power in the midst of two failing, unpopular wars! The paradoxes are numerous.
Yes, America, you did this to yourself. You've gone and caused yet another blog to be written- yet another ranting series of diatribes randomly generated in the cluttered, binary world of the internet.
Tonight, I could go into a rant about this political issue or that. But, what really has me going are all you people out there. You walking sound-bite lemmings, you short sighted fools who know nothing of the inner workings of the political or economic processes of this country, but know what you've heard, and will be damned if a few popular phrases don't just sum up your ability to critically think about the issues.
Yes, Teabaggers, you're part of this, but so are the soccer moms and work-a-day types who don't bother to inform themselves and just parrot the ludicrous bile they hear on TV.
"Well, I'm just sick of all this big government. Someone needs to stop them."
"You can't just be a tax and spend liberal."
"Obamacare is socialist."
Blah, blah, blah. SHUT UP, America.
Sick of Big Government? Move into an Anarchist commune. You'll love their socialist systems of economic reciprocity! Or, barring that, get used to "Big Government"- Its not going away anytime soon, and I think a government is at its "biggest" and most intrusive when its telling people how to live, who to love, or what to smoke. But of course, most of you are fine with the hypocrisy that comes with railing against so-called "big" Government whilst lobbying for it to intrude upon the personal lives of others. Where was you outrage with the Patriot Act in 2001? The Habeas Corpus Act in 06? The illegal Wire taps? Oh, that didn't bother you? Then SHUT UP, America.
Can't be a tax and spend Liberal? First, I'd argue that its much more reckless to be a No Tax All Spend Conservative, especially when you're spending at least 800 BILLION and counting on a strategic quagmire called the war in Iraq. Furthermore, if you had even a rudimentary understanding of economics, you would understand that the best economic minds in our country were disappointed that the stimulus- which worked- was TOO SMALL! You would be aware of Keynesian economics, you know the economic theories which pulled this country out of the depression and laid the groundwork for our best social safety net- Social Security. I'd like to see any of you old, conservative, fiscally prudent people deny your social security benefits.
Obamacare is socialist, I'll give you that. I mean, seriously, handing private corporations 30+ million new consumers with the caveat that the corporation can't drop them simply because they're sick, yeah I'm pretty sure that's what Marx and Engels were talking about.
America, you are like a drunken fool who can't decide what guy to date so you call them both up to the bar and watch them fight. Despite the wear and tear, the complete lack of faith you've instilled in your electorate, of all things, the Democrats managed to get some decent work done in the last few years. It wasn't perfect, some of it falls far short of what it could have been, but it was progress.
And now, like Lando, you've gone and sold us out again America.
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